Fragility: Nothing to Hide

We’ve seen it before. The numerous articles implying that us girls and guys have to act cool, calm and collected in order to win over the affection of others. We have to act like we don’t give a damn. We have to act like we are okay with whatever our significant other is doing because we don’t want to seem crazy. I’m not sure how this started, but I do know that there is nothing wrong with being fragile.

If you are easily hurt, offended, or upset, it is okay. This is a reminder not to hide your feelings.


Perplexed by Hate (but who Isn’t?)

Like most people,  I fall victim to obsessively checking any and all social media platforms when I wake up. Part of it is my FOMO or fear of missing out on all the posts I’ve missed during my snooze but the main reason is sheer procrastination. I have become accustomed to all kinds of posts: the rants, the memes, the promos. However, there is still one kind of post I could never get used to: the opinion. But not just any kind of opinion: the one that is fueled solely and purposefully by hate. I completely understand that with the presidential race there is a lot of that going around, which is fine, because it matters. What I am perplexed by is the hate that occurs over stuff that makes other people happy and does not directly affect others.

My examples will be brought to you by Twitter so you can get a better idea of what I’m saying. We’ll start with Cole Sprouse:


I value your opinion, Cole Sprouse, I really do. But I am perplexed by why this bothers you so much? Why is this such a horrible thing? Why can’t you do it anymore? If we enjoy the dog filter, we are going to use the damn dog filter. Don’t you have other things to worry about? In the words of Kourtney Kardashian, Cole, there are people dying. 

Next we will focus on a few I stumbled upon featuring the hate women receive for, like I said, doing what makes them happy. Through my research I found that people tend to question why girls do things more so than guys. Worst part? The shade is usually coming from other girls:


Ok, so the hickey thing I kind of get. It could make people uncomfortable and let’s face it they aren’t very appropriate in most settings; however, some people (I guess girls, in this case) want to show them off.  So what? No one is implying they are cute. Sometimes it’s exhilarating to show off your amazing sex life without even having to say anything. What’s the harm in that? Who is it hurting? As for the other two, it blows my mind and perplexes me to no end that girls are still putting other girls down for when and why they wear makeup. By all means I am not implying that girls need makeup to feel beautiful; however, some girls do rely on it for a self confidence boost and that’s okay.  Let people do what they want with their bodies. Especially if it makes them feel good. If you feel better going to a pool party dressed up and taking a selfie before bed with a face pull of makeup on then go for it! You look bomb either way, girl. You do you.

Obviously girls aren’t the only ones who suffer from this. For example:


Yes, some guys go over board with the car posts. But who cares? No one is implying it’s cool. Most guys are incredibly into cars and if I had the gaul to constantly post pictures of my makeup I would. I applaud people for sharing what they are proud of and passionate about.

There are so many other things in this world to be concerned about. I’m telling you. Everyone is completely entitled to their own opinions, hell, this right here is an opinion piece; however, I do think it’s important that we don’t put people down for doing what they want to do as long as they aren’t hurting anybody. Using the dog filter, wearing makeup to pool parties and to bed, taking pictures of your car? Good for you. As a society we need to get passed putting others down and questioning people for trivial stuff like this. It is important for us (and especially us girls) to stick together. Until then, I’ll be chillin’ in that constant state of perplexity.


It’s Hard out There for Makeup Lovers (blog)

It’s Wednesday afternoon. I am sitting in my living room, chair reclined, hair up in a messy bun I actually worked very hard on, and a face of makeup on my otherwise dull and blotchy face. It is only a matter of time before my mom, dad, and brother come home from work and ask me the dreaded question: why are you wearing a face full of makeup just to sit at home and watch TV?

I realize this sounds slightly pathetic as I write. Fortunately, it’s probable that a lot of people cannot relate because unlike me: a lot of people are employed. However, I do know from past experiences that this very question gets asked in the workplace as well as outside of it. Why are you wearing so much makeup to go to work? Why did you beat your face down just to stare at a computer? Who are you trying to impress here in the office? Etc. I’m sure you know what I mean. The best reaction to this, I found, is to roll your perfectly winged and shadowed eyes and walk away. Because no matter how many times we try to explain, most people continue to view us as shallow or try-hards.

Us makeup lovers seriously get so much shade. If we are not getting reamed for wearing too much or wearing too little, we are getting butchered for how much we spend on it (and yes even I can agree that sometimes $60 for foundation is outrageous) but there is no harm in indulging on something you are passionate about. I see the face as a canvas and my foundations and concealers and highlighters are the tools I use to make art. I enjoy sitting at my vanity, tying my hair back, applying lotion, and going IN. I look forward to that every morning even if I am not going anywhere. Even if I am just sitting on the couch watching TV all day, I look forward to creating art on my face and experimenting and improving. I enjoy trying out crazy colored eyeliners and discovering which eye shadows bring out my brown eyes. I enjoy trying different blending techniques. It’s like everyday is a new creation.

Take an artist for example. Not a makeup artist, but tools on canvas (or what have you) kind of artist. This artist can experiment with pastels, watercolors, spray paint, anything. All of these different mediums and tools are very expensive, and still, I don’t think it’s as looked down upon. I am in no way implying that artists have it easy (I know very well it’s difficult and can get discouraging) but I do know that when people find out my eyeliner is $20, I always get the same reaction: why spend $20 on eyeliner when you can get it for $5 at Wal-Mart? Well, the same reason the artist wants to spend hundreds on legitimate supplies. The same reason that car lover spends thousands supping up his truck.

But the hardest part isn’t even the judgment we get for spending. It’s the constant assumption that because we wear a lot of make up it means we are insecure. I have had girlfriends of mine tell me I “don’t need to try too hard” and put me down for how much I wear. I have had douche bag guys ask me what I’m hiding behind all of that “fake,” and of course I have had the classic boyfriend pep talk: “why do you wear so much makeup? You look so much better natural.” And it’s seriously simple: because I want to. Because applying it makes me happy, and yes, I admit, a little more confident. Because when my wings are sharp and my contour is fierce I feel like I can literally do anything. No, I don’t need it to feel that way but it definitely helps.

So, I am going to contour and highlight the heck out of my face before that doctor’s appointment and before that baseball game and especially before that job interview. I am going to spend that $60 on that foundation because it’s probably going to make me glow like the heavens and make my skin as soft as a puppies furry little head. I am going to beat my face down and wear it loud and proud and not because I’m insecure. Not because I have to. Because I want to.